Dream ... And Ask.

There is nothing in the universe I would ever rather be doing than singing harmony.

I can sing lead when the occasion arises, but I cannot tell you how much I would rather be singing harmony. It is where my heart lives, it’s as vital and effortless to me as breathing, and it is the greatest joy I have ever known.

There are a few people in particular I love singing with; the blending of our voices has a depth and a magic I never even knew existed. 

Growing up in the shadow of my mother’s deep depresson and its heavy spirit of “no,” it was a fundamental truth of the universe that if I wanted something, I didn’t get to have it. 

It’s my instinct to believe that to this day.

That spirit of “no” was so heavy that the very wanting or loving of something or someone feels like a crime against humanity, rendering me unworthy and undeserving.

I learned to the core of my being that my desire and love - by virtue of their very existence - literally make me repulsive to the things and people I want and love.

So, I tend to walk through my days vaguely grieving the fact that I don’t get to sing with these particular voices and souls I love very often, and dreaming of the far-off day I may get to sing with them again. 

Then I stop and remember something.

Um, when was the last time I actually ASKED to sing with them? 

The last time I actually went to them, song in hand, and said “Hey, will you sing this with me?“

Depending on the person, it’s generally been somewhere between months, years, and NEVER.

There are people I've grieved not getting to sing with ... When I've not one time actually asked to sing with them.

What dreams are you grieving, that you’ve simply never asked for?

It is So. Worth. Asking.

The answer won’t always be yes, and sometimes there will be no answer at all.

There’s something miraculously true about that, though: As I’ve learned so powerfully from the guy I'm singing with in the photo above, my favorite artist and human I hear from once in a blue moon, no answer does not mean no. When I spoke into the universe - also known as Twitter - my dream of singing with him in his show, I got no answer.

Until I was sitting in the front row of said show and he invited up to sing, without a moment's warning or rehearsal!

Another important lesson: When you speak your dream, you'd best be ready for it.

And I was.

I jumped up on that stage next to the artist and human I love and admire more deeply than anyone who has ever graced my path, and we sang a version of a song we'd never sung together in our lives. While the invitation and the song were complete surprises, I had seen that moment a thousand times in my mind as I dreamed about it, and I knew his entire catalog inside and out.

Luck truly is when opportunity meets preparation. 

For those moments the answer is no, something else is miraculously true: Every moment after this one is a mystery, so even an actual no can only ever mean not now.

Walking in the world open to the wonder and mystery of unfolding - rather than filled with expectations and married to the way things are now - is one of the greatest lessons I've learned on my healing journey.

I've also discovered this: If someone knows it’s within their power to make your dream come true, they nearly always will.

Wouldn’t you?

Dream.

And prepare.

Then ASK. 

You'll be stunned how often the answer is yes.